NFL Picks Week 4
“Go ahead, make my day.” Easier said than done, but, okay, after three weeks, here’s what we know:
First, Carson Palmer's washed up. He should have been intercepted at least four times last week, except the Carolina DBs are even worse than he is and they dropped easy passes. Second, the Patriots are going to score a ton of points this season, but their defense will give up just as many. And third, there are only a few class teams in the league – Atlanta, New Orleans, Chicago, Green Bay, and Pittsburgh. The Jets may prove themselves, but that’s not clear yet. And the Chiefs are young, but they may make believers of us yet.
San Francisco at Atlanta (-7)
The Falcons played like Super Bowl contenders in beating the Saints last week. According to Cheech, “San Francisco’s coach Mike Singletary may look scary and breathe fire, but his team’s got nuthin.” Taking the Falcons all the way.
NY Jets (-5) at Buffalo
The Jets outlasted a very good Dolphins team last week. And Buffalo showed how porous the Patriots defense is by scoring 30 points. But Bobby-Big-Fingers says, “Don’t expect the Bills to score much against the Green Machine.” Taking the Jets to cover.
Cincinnati (-3.5) at Cleveland
If the Bengals had been playing any team other than the Panthers last week, they would have had a dozen turnovers and a loss. Fortunately for them, as Sallie Boy puts it, “Carolina DBs couldn’t catch a cold.” Still, the Browns are 0-3. Taking the Bengals to win, but the Browns with the points.
Detroit at Green Bay (-13.5)
Benny Bagels says, “The Lions has lost so many games on the road, people has stopped counting.” For those who have paid attention, it’s 22 in a row. Meanwhile, Green Bay helped beat themselves against the Bears, committing one foolish penalty after the next, 18 in all, for 152 yards. “There were more flags flying there than on the roof of the United Nations,” Bagels says. But the Lions are on the road again. Taking the Pack to cover.
Carolina at New Orleans (-13.5)
“If the Panthers keep going with rookie QB Jimmy Clausen,” says Frankie Nuts, “they’re gonna get killed.” “Meanwhile,” he adds, “the Saints is human.” New Orleans’ kicker Hartley almost lost the opener to the Vikings, and last week shanked the potential winner from short range in OT, handing the game to Atlanta. They just signed Carney and may keep two kickers. “Don’t make no kinda sense,” says Nuts. Taking the Saints to win, but the Panthers with the points.
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