Feature: Soapbox Musings

A Humble Suggestion For The President

Author: Benjamin Wendell
Published: November 02, 2010 at 11:39 am
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Don't Ask Don't Tell extended indefinitely.

Before his hair turned grey.Listen, Barack, can we talk? You're about to have your ass handed to you on a platter this evening.

By sun-up the Speaker of the House will be a guy you have to remind yourself doesn't rhyme with "loaner" and Nancy Pelosi will relegate to the second seat form the left on the House Subcommittee on Soy Slug Infestations.

Everything you try to accomplish will be blocked by a bunch of folks carrying revised copies of the Constitution, bibles, and autographed copies of Glen Beck's latest tome. Everything you've already accomplished will quite possibly be reversed, and anything left standing will continue to piss off folks who believe that evolution blasphemy and education is overrated. Your chances of re-election in 2012 are just slightly better than Detroit's chances of winning a SuperBowl. So it's not like you can make things a hell of a lot worse.

Here's what you should do: Pull out a piece of that presidential stationery, the ones with the cool blue and gold embossed seal at the top, and write the following:


"The United States military in all its branches will not discriminate in any way against any soldier based on gender identity or sexual preference. Any soldier who has been discharged for reasons of gender identity or sexual preference will have the right to be reinstated without loss of rank or privilege. This order takes effect immediately.

Barack H. Obama, Commander-In-Chief"

There. Now don't you feel better?

 
 

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Article Author: Benjamin Wendell

Hey, blogophiles. I'm Benjamin A. Wendell,M.D., but you can call me Ben. After reading a couple of my posts, some of you will probably want to call me "ignorant bastard", which is equally fine, just so long as you do so in the comments section and tell your friends to come and abuse me as well. …

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